[I know there've been newspaper headlines before, but these are really wired!]
- Cause of AIDS Found - Scientists
- Doctor Testifies in Horse Suit
- City May Impose Mandatory Time for Prostitution
- Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Axe
- Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole in One
- Kicking Baby Considered to Be Healthy
- Why You Want Sex Changes With Age
- Boys Cause As Many Pregnancies As Girls
- Cemetery Allows People to be Buried by Their Pets
- Man Held Over Giant L.A. Brush Fire
- Antique Stripper to Demonstrate Wares at Store
- Sudden Rush to Help People Out of Work
- Deadline Passes for Striking Police